Thomas & Mercer (July 1, 2022)

In this unforgettable psychological thriller, the dark is a terrifying mystery for a woman on the edge.

Seven hard-won months into her sobriety, sociology professor Maris Heilman has her first blackout. She chalks it up to exhaustion, though she fears that her husband and daughter will suspect she’s drinking again. Whatever their cause, the glitches start becoming more frequent. Sometimes minutes, sometimes longer, but always leaving Maris with the same disorienting question: Where have I been?

Then another blackout lands Maris in the ER, where she makes an alarming discovery. A network of women is battling the same inexplicable malady. Is it a bizarre coincidence or something more sinister? What do all the women have in common besides missing time? Or is it who they have in common?

In a desperate search for answers, Maris has no idea what’s coming next, just the escalating paranoia that her memories may be beyond her control, and that everything she knows could disappear in the blink of an eye.

 

My Rating:

 

Favorite Quotes:

 

“Everyone thinks old people are old except for old people.” Maris knew what she meant. When she was twenty, she thought forty-two sounded like you had a foot in the grave, but despite the math she still wouldn’t call herself middle-aged.

When she and Noel started dating, they called it second adolescence, only better than the first because they had high limits on their credit cards.

Maris felt like someone had told her the earth was flat, then strapped her in and sent her flying over the edge.

She missed her students. Two had emailed her to say Dr. Scanlon had fallen asleep at the front of the class while they were taking a test and had farted himself awake.

I am worthy, she thought. I am loved. And then, My god, it’s like I finally understand bumper stickers, and she hiccuped out a laugh.

 

My Review:

 

This prickly book had a bit of everything and was distressingly realistic with family drama, addiction issues, social ills, complicated yet frighteningly plausible neuroscience, a twisted mystery, and deeply flawed characters who were self-involved yet generally well-meaning while difficult to fully appreciate.

I battled with the slow and irregular pace as well as the self-admittedly poor decisions the main character continued to make – I wanted to smack her in the back of the head with my beloved Kindle – yet I was also unquestionably curious, deeply invested in the story, and compelled to know how it was going to resolve.

The Easter eggs hidden in the storylines were clever and twisty yet the various story threads kept me itchy and dissatisfied with the annoying behaviors of the struggling characters. Needless to say, I’m more than a bit conflicted about how to rate this one yet the inner musings and narrative style were insightful and perceptive with occasional glimmers of wit and brilliance.