My Rating:

Favorite Quotes:

 

‘It’s not All Creatures Great and Small, Dad,’ she said impatiently. ‘There’s more to rural life these days than cousin marriage and cow-fisting.’

 

‘Exceptional. You know they put that on your school report once? Exceptional’ … He could remember a few choice phrases from those reports himself. It hadn’t been all exceptionals… from his Biology teacher: ‘Alexander would do rather better if he spent more time properly studying the reproductive system diagrams and less time doodling beards on the testicles’.

 

His mum was right, he was gifted. Gifted at being a little bugger.

 

‘It’s hard to feel sexy with a kid in your life, what with the endless bouts of screaming and bodily fluids. Life at home these days is like the director’s cut of The Exorcist, now with extra vomit.’ ‘You’re really not selling parenthood to me, you know.’ ‘Good. Save yourself, love, while you still can.’

 

‘Sometimes it feels like there must’ve been some sort of special lesbian school that all the others had access to but me. You know, like a gay Hogwarts.’ ‘What, you mean you didn’t get your owl-delivered letter letting you know you were one of the lucky few who’d been selected to fancy girls?’

 

‘Jacob’s not a kid, he’s Satan incarnate.’ … ‘I brought story books, a pan-pipe CD and some biscuits to help soothe the savage beast.’ ‘Did you bring a crucifix and a couple of gallons of holy water?’

 

‘So are you feeling broody after that?’ Nell asked Xander when they were outside. ‘Are you kidding? I’ll be booking myself in for a vasectomy next week.’

My Review:

 

I adored every perfectly chosen word of this cleverly amusing and well-crafted tale. I smirked and giggled-snorted with glee as Lisa Swift, AKA, Mary Jayne Baker is found treasure and a master storyteller.   Reading this tale was pure delight – I had a ream of exceptionally witty highlights on my Kindle and it was painful to pare the list down and decide what to include in this review. Oh happy day, a new author to add to the very top of my list of Favorite Things.

The characters were endearing, adorable, and colorfully detailed while the storylines were engaging and held my rapt attention while tickling my funny bone and teasing my curiosity in equal measure, as there was a mystery afoot and a petty and villainous bureaucrat always lurking. The banter between the main characters was quite witty and fun. The writing was simply stellar and deftly paced. I tumbled right into Ms. Swift’s story and resented all interruptions to my perusal as I didn’t want to leave it behind.   When forced away from my beloved Kindle, I found I was often smiling to myself and contemplating the characters and replaying their storylines in my head while hurriedly completing the dastardly deeds and annoying intrusions to my reading known as daily living so I could return to the far more enticing story awaiting me.

I struck gold with a massive influx of fun words for my Brit Word List with dead-man’s-bootsed – being in a situation where you can’t advance until someone else dies or retires so you can step into their position, lecky – electricity, apeth – an affectionate term for a silly or foolish person, and off your chump – crazy.