What do a wrong number text, a burning building, and a quirky florist have in common?
A hunky firefighter with an extra-large…hosepipe.
Kiss Me Tonight, an all-new hilarious standalone romance from New York Times bestselling author Emma Hart is available now!
In hindsight, I never should have opened that text message. The last thing I needed first thing on a Monday was a picture of some stranger’s, um, eggplant, in my inbox.
I also should have replaced the batteries in my fire alarm, because my Friday night did not need to end with my apartment building going up in flames.
But it’s fine. It’s fine. Everything is fine.
I’m only lying in a hospital bed with more split ends than I’ve ever had, almost all my Earthly possessions have turned to ash, and apparently, they don’t serve wine to patients in this place.
But like I said, it’s fine.
Until he walks in.
The guy who saved my life. My hero. Noah Jacobs.
And the universe is amusing itself at my expense, because the dirty photo I woke up to on Monday?
It’s his.
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My Rating:
Favorite Quotes:
“Aunt Bethel,” I said, pinching the bridge of my nose. “I am not going to stage a boudoir shoot for you to give Harry James for his birthday. He has a pacemaker and a stent. You’ll kill the poor man.”
With those muscles, the only thing sweeping you off your feet is a hurricane.
I’m in my old bedroom and there’s a poster of Justin Timberlake with noodle hair.
I would bet a hundred bucks that he’d never met anyone like me before. Not that I was tooting my own horn— I knew I was what normal people called ‘unique.’ I mean, my best friend fed raccoons, so compared to her… I was only a little strange.
Men like him were why catfights started. It was evolution. We women were biologically wired to seek out and find the strongest, most manly man we could so we could procreate and keep up the questionable strength of the human line. Noah fit that to a tee. He was definitely the kind of person I’d pop a few crotch goblins out with.
My Review:
Emma Hart is a clever minx, and I am irrevocably besotted with her. I adore her irreverent humor and saucy wit while I jealously covet her snappy wordplay. This is the fifth book of hers I have read and her quirky characters and amusing storylines (both full of sizzle and sass) have never failed to produce giggle-snorts in ample measure while leaving a near-permanent smirk on my face. Kiss Me Tonight was no exception.
Written in my favorite dual POV, Kiss Me Tonight begins with the unusual and somewhat alarming event of an errant text message with a little something extra, well, actually, a big something extra, an intimate exposure of a male’s… sacred member. It seems the female which the drunken Noah had been corresponding with on a dating site had requested a… candid shot, but supplied a bogus or incorrect number for the private text. The message ended up on the spunky Reagan’s phone and had her debating what course of action to take. Reagan was such a fun and lively character, she was a self-proclaimed “drama llama” with an even quirkier family which included a feisty and highly inappropriate octogenarian, my favorite kind, of course.
I will be anxiously awaiting the next cheeky installment to this humorous series.
Excerpt
“Hi.”
I glanced over at him, my lips curving. “Hi.”
“You ready?”
“To escape the madhouse? What do you think?”
“That I should put my foot down.”
I winked and clicked my belt into place. “Let’s go. Where are we going?”
Noah pulled away from the curb. “I was going to let you direct me. I haven’t been in town long, like I said, and I definitely haven’t been out for lunch.”
I leaned back in the seat. “Hmm. What do you want to eat?”
“You’re the one breaking out of jail. I’m happy to go wherever you want to.”
“Oh, no. I hate making decisions like this. Do you know how difficult it is to pick somewhere to eat?” I shifted my whole body so I could look at him. “Do you want Chinese? Thai? Steak? Korean? Pizza? Burgers? Caribbean? Mexican? Spanish? French? Italian?”
Noah’s gaze darted my way. “Do you have all those places in Creek Falls?”
“No, but that doesn’t make the decision any easier,” I replied. “Well? Burgers? Pizza? Mexican? Italian? Steak? Or Chinese?”
“I don’t—shit me, I feel like I’m being interrogated by the fucking Government.”
“You may as well be. Pick somewhere and I’ll tell you where to go.”
“I said you can pick.”
“I don’t care. I’ve been everywhere. They’re all good. You’re the new boy in town. Pick somewhere.”
“You’re demanding, do you know that?”
“Yes, Preston—oh, he’s my brother—regularly points out how demanding and difficult I am.” I paused. “If you really want me to pick, I will, but you can’t complain after.”
He turned the blinker on so we’d head in the direction of Main Street. “You just said they’re all good.”
“They are, but it’s not my fault if you feel like pizza and end up with a taco.”
“I can honestly say that I do not care what I eat for lunch as long as it’s edible.”
“Right. Then turn left, then right, and pull into the parking lot next to the liquor store.”
“I see you’re taking us to a reputable location.”
“Oh, no. The liquor store is a pit stop. It just happens to be on the way to the Mexican place I like.”
“I see. So you’re using me for liquor.”
“You’ve met my great-aunt. Damn straight I’m using you for liquor.”
About Emma Hart
Emma Hart is the New York Times and USA Today bestselling author of over thirty novels and has been translated into several different languages.
She is a mother, wife, lover of wine, Pink Goddess, and valiant rescuer of wild baby hedgehogs.
Emma prides herself on her realistic, snarky smut, with comebacks that would make a PMS-ing teenage girl proud.
Yes, really. She’s that sarcastic.
Connect with Emma
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Website: https://www.emmahart.org/home
Kiss me every night… 😂 😂
Yayy fabtastic review… I loved your enthusiasm…
Yay. Glad that you enjoyed it as much as I did. I am also glad that we both managed to avoid any of the descriptive words used on the first page in our reviews. 😀
Sound sassy with a hint of female power
I really need to pick up an Emma Hart book.
These books all sound amazing. Great review and thanks for the excerpt – Loved it.
That Justine Timberlake quote has me laughing! My brother-in-law used to have the noodle hair too!
Love the sound of this one! And that cover though!!
This sounds like it was a hoot. Glad you enjoyed it.
Totally Addicted to Reading
have added this book to my tbr already.. and as always, your wordplay in your review delights me..
Great review!
Amazing review my friend. I really want to check this book out because I keep on hearing amazing reviews about this book. Thank you so much for sharing your awesome post.
Glad you enjoyed this book!