My Disorganised Life
by Nina Whyle
A viral video of drunkenness and vomiting over a policeman is the stuff of nightmares, and so is living back home with your religious, nutty parents. Fed up with life not going her way and turning quietly insane, Eve Poots comes up with a plan. Well more of a list of “things to do while I’m still twenty-something”.
Six months later, and the list is working its power: she is now living with her new boyfriend, junior doctor Adam, and working as an assistant to TV producer Alastair on a reality show – life really is on the up.
But then it all starts to crumble and she soon realises that what the list should have really said was:
1. Awful colleague hell-bent in making your life agonising – check
2. Unplanned engagement – check
3. Lusting for dashing TV director when you have a perfectly decent boyfriend at home – check
4. Seeking help from a sex therapist – check
5. Growing a back-bone – pending
Has her life suddenly turned into a TV melodrama of its own?
“She said the Tequila would help me relax into a more laid-back Mexican version of myself. It didn’t. What it actually did was make me a crazy and felonious Mexican version of myself.”
“He smiles, showing a perfect row of white teeth. I don’t think I’ve ever met an American who hasn’t got lovely teeth, but so do sharks. Well, they have a lot of teeth anyway.”
“I just want to get this over with as quickly as possible, then for someone to put me in a sanatorium with a selection of crayons and tranquilizers, and leave me alone for the rest of my life.”
“I have to encompass my true sexual being, take control, and unleash the beast, so to speak. Crikey, what if I don’t have one? Not everyone is overtly sexual, are they? What if my beast is more of a domesticated budgie grateful for a few seeds and a new piece of sandpaper? The Nunnery is looking the more attractive option right now. I don’t think I can do the practical therapy.”
“Her gentle forcefulness is covertly Jedi. I would feel like a naughty child if I didn’t produce my homework.”
“He makes my skin crawl to the point of fungal infection.”
“I can’t understand anything this girl is jabbering about, it’s a high-pitched talk-a-thon gone wrong. Quick talking is an understatement, it’s as though Disney have made a princess machine gun.”
“What is that woman doing? She looks like a daddy longlegs being electrocuted!”
This book was wicked funny. I frequently snorted, chortled, snickered, and barked aloud at the ridiculous situations our girl found herself in. How well I know the correlation of Tequila = eventual humiliation. I felt an instant kinship with the main character of Eve as we have so many things in common, for example, we both tend to be a constant source of embarrassment despite our best efforts, we both suffered the ridiculousness of religious zealots for parents, we both are list makers – which we use as more of a guide… and we both have a humorous and often snarky running commentary in our addled brains that tends to find it’s way out of our mouths. In other words – she is an intelligent and fun-loving goddess. The writing style was rapid paced yet relatively easy to follow, despite some of the unfamiliar British pop-cultural references – thank goodness for Wikipedia on my kindle. I was entertained by this delightful and fun story throughout, and enjoyed Eve’s insights and evolution as the story progressed.